Archive for Faith Based Decision Making

Just Do It Now!

Happy New Year! 

We are all fresh from making our New Years goals and have every intention of achieving those goals, so how to not get frustrated and give up before we even get to February, 2011? 

One thing that you can do that will help you arrive at the place you want to be in life is to truly recognize your talents and skills. When you are truly blessed with a talent recognize it and develop it! We are all blessed with talent. Don’t ignore a divine gift. If you can do something better, or with more passion and vigor, than most people then recognize, development and use it.   

If you have a God-given talent, don’t let it lie dormant. Don’t let anyone tell you what you have to do to be successful, or worse yet, what you cannot do with your life and your blessings.  

For example if you are a performer and good at it, then pursue your craft. Should you take some bookkeeping or carpentry classes along the way to following your passion? Yes! Use it as a fallback in between jobs or a way to generate income until you get work and become a successful performer or artist. The same goes for any profession, CPA, sculptor, etc. You may need to sacrifice along the way to achieve it so put a plan together and do it. Every skill you master makes you a more rounded person. Learn everything that you can as well as trying to learn something new each day. 

All that being said however, you don’t want to put off accepting your blessing and leaving it to some distant date in the future. Just get moving. If your desire is to become a lawyer, doctor or entrepreneur, don’t panic because you don’t have funds to pay for your education or begin your business right at this moment. Examine your desires, your talents, your passion and begin working on a plan that has actions steps and reasonable dates to make it your reality. I find when I’m pursuing a goal there is a tremendous amount of frustration for me if I don’t have a plan of action. Once I have one my energy shifts from the negativity of no progress to one of focusing on the execution that takes me toward my goal. 

“All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence.” Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Focal Point – The Promise

Focal Point – The Promise by Theodore HendersonWhat is your vision for your life over the next 5, 10, 15, or even 50 years?  We must live in the moment and enjoy what we have but that certainly doesn’t mean we can have a far ranging outlook deep into the future.  Successful career coaching and mentoring always includes a far ranging vision in addition to methods for handling your near term necessities.  For example the Five O’clock Club uses a 40-year vision plan as part of your career transformation process.

A vision plan is important because it is the map of your journey.  Every journey has two things in common, a beginning and an end point. It may sound like common sense but so many of us have no direction and no focus.  We must literally take the time to determine where we are in life. 

  • Where are you in your career? 
  • Where are you spiritually? 
  • Where are you financially?
  • Where are you emotionally? 
  • Where are you in terms of your relationships with family and friends?

Keep asking yourself these types of questions about the key areas of your life.  Your direction is determined by the quality of the questions and the content of the answers.  The answers will define what needs to change.  Your response will determine what will change. 

The next step is to be very precise about what you want.  You wanting to become a millionaire is not precise.  You wanting to become a millionaire because you have determined that amount or more will allow you to pay off debt, send your children to college, invest in your faith and community, and start the business you have planned for is precise.  It has emotional impact and forms the basis to drive forward. 

Vague goals generally don’t work and get you nowhere. The more general they are, the less power they have. But the more specific they are, the more sway and authority they have in your life. 

Define your goal in terms of the positive or desired outcome not the problem at hand.  As per the Merriam-Webster dictionary a promise is a reason to expect; especially: ground for expectation of success, improvement, or excellence <shows considerable promise>. 

Compare this to a problem, which is a source of perplexity, distress, or vexation.  Therefore the question is should we focus on the promise or the problem?  I chose the promise because if you focus on disease you get sick but if you focus on good health the likely hood of better health dramatically increases.  You can focus on previous bad relationships or you can focus on the good one you are in (or to come).  Either way whatever we focus on we move toward.  Move toward the promise and put distance between yourself and the problem. 

An excellent biblical representation of this is in Genesis chapter 24:7 “The LORD, the God of heaven, who brought me out of my father’s household and my native land and who spoke to me and promised me on oath, saying, ‘To your offspring [a] I will give this land’-he will send his angel before you so that you can get a wife for my son from there.”  This was the promise. 

12 Then he prayed, “O LORD, God of my master Abraham, give me success today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. 13 See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. 14 May it be that when I say to a girl, ‘Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I’ll water your camels too’-let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master.”  This was his plan. 

15 “Before he had finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel son of Milcah, who was the wife of Abraham’s brother Nahor.”  The promise fulfilled.

These verses are excerpt from the story of Isaac and Rebekah in Genesis chapter 24 and it contains all of the elements of focusing on the promise, a compelling goal, successful planning and fruition.  It is a lesson worth remembering.

How to Begin the Conversation About Estate Planning

Communication and estate planning are inseperable by Theodore HendersonEven after your children have left home and begun families of their own, many parents experience some reluctance to have heart-to-heart talks with them about issues of aging. These are both emotional and financial issues, and lack of proper planning can have a devastating impact on everyone involved.

Ask yourself this. Have provisions been made for you and your spouse that deal with potential care and end-of-life issues from both a financial and personal viewpoint?  Have you ensured that there is a up-to-date healthcare proxy, power of attorney and a will? Failure to have these documents available to your adult children or other potential care givers can result in problems down the road.

The sad truth is that too many adult children have not asked their parents these questions, either because it is just too uncomfortable or painful and because they simply don’t want to hurt their feelings or cause them anxiety. However, communication is key to ensuring that an estate plan is both adequate and well understood.

These steps may help you open up a dialogue about these sensitive issues.

  1. Begin the conversation. It may be difficult to contemplate, but you do have to start somewhere. Have a healthcare proxy, power of attorney and will be created? If so, are they reviewed annually to take into account life changes such as death of a partner, financial changes, etc.?
  2. Last Will and Testament. This is the first and most basic of the estate planning documents. This document ensures that your assets pass after your death as you intended them to.
  3. Power of Attorney and Health Care Proxy. These documents give a trust family member or other person the legal ability to take care of your personal finances or make health care decisions for you if you should become disabled and unable to make decisions on your own.

While it is very important to have these end-of-life documents are in place and updated as needed, it is also important to discuss life issues, particularly as parents grow older. Adult children need to know if their parents have enough money to get by in retirement. They need to know if their parents have sufficient money for living expenses, food and prescriptions. Additionally, there should be some frank discussions about long-term care in case of a life altering event such as a stroke or other medical condition that can cause disabilities. 

The other side of the coin is that parents also need to know how their adult children feel about their aging issues. While many parents may not want to burden a child with their care responsibilities, they may well find that their children want and need to be part of the conversation and the solutions.  It is important for all parties to honestly and openly discuss their views.

Remember, only communication between parents and children can ensure that your plans are properly executed.